ThE cUrIoUs LiFe Of HC

3am Telephone call

2011-01-05T04:12:00.000-06:00

So I was at work tonight sitting at the front dest at about 3am-ish.

Me: Hello, this is Helen how can I help you.
Caller: It has been dark all day, I just want to know if it is going to be dark for the rest of the day.
Me: Well it is 3am so it is dark, it will be dark till about 7am.
Caller: Oh really you believe it will get light at 7am?
Me: I believe so ma'am.
Caller: So it will not be dark anymore.
Me: Yes (chuckle)

I mean seriously am I being pranked?!?! Lol
Or it could be a resident that is super old and is it losing!!

Smiles for everyone!!

2011-01-03T19:53:00.000-06:00

I have a thing for smiles. It is true, I love them so much I become enticed by the "smiler." I believe a smile can say a lot about a person or simply put one on your face. I can say that I have targeted some people to become friends with because they are always smiling and usually tend to be positive folks. I don't know what it is that attracts me to a person who is smiling but its like secretly they are reeling me through some subliminal message. haha

Dr. Wesson, I remember him clearly as though I was just in his classroom at UIC yesterday. He always walked in with this amazing smile that just made you want to hug him, he could do no wrong because he always had this smile, besides his amazing smile he was brilliant and well spoken. My current professor Remedi, has a way about his teachings and a smile that is unforgettable. Do NOT WORRY this blog is not about some crush on my professors, but about smiles :) It is just that they are so memorable because they are positive people, no matter what the situation is.

I have to give some shout outs to some other amazing smilers, these smilers are very unique to me; Davey, Annie, Kate, and Steve, there is a similarity between all these people not only do they have uplifting smiles, but they are very positive in almost every way thinkable. They are kind and inspire me to have this characteristic as well.

I have a fantastic friend, who seems to inspire me every time I get a chance to visit or speak to him. Sometimes in my crazy life, I have an escape through his wild stories and the way he lives his life. Things always seems to work for him, even in his chaotic plans. He is truly blessed. He always seems to motivate me and give me hope and encouragement. I wish to make others smile the way he makes me smile. He reminds me that the petty little problems and drama of life are so insignificant that we can move on to the fantastic things life has to offer. He's a handy little fellow who is brilliant and a pleasure to have in my life. I have known him for years but yet there is always a vibrant friendship. I only wish I could be surrounded more by people like him but that is not always possible.

This same little friend reminded me of something powerful. I was a bit annoyed and perhaps upset I would say. I am a planner, I like to hang out with my friends, spend some time out, eat out, laugh and have good conversation. I make the effort, I am driven. But this past year things have been kind of hectic around here. I have been completely devoted to my studies, volunteering and work. I barely have time to hang out. The frustration comes from this; I make an effort to keep friendships. The only problem is that one person cannot do all the work, it is like that saying "it takes 2 to tango!" So as frustrated as I felt that some of the people I seemed to think as "friends" did not want to " tango". Sometimes its not meant to be and there are way more important things to focus on, then who wants to make the EFFORT. Which I suppose that is easier said then done. I was getting all worked up for nothing, since I don't want them to change unless they want to. People seem to make things very clear without saying much. And sometimes you just have take a hint and get rid of the negative. However, headaches and sadness over this is a complete waste of time.

I know to cherish what I do have in front of me. Therefore 2011 starts without sweating others and more smiles. I love becoming inspired by people. I can't help but love them. I really love the fact that I find new faces and create new relationships, I love changes. I can't be still forever, so folks let's move on.

I am putting the lazies, unthoughtful, shady, and unresponsive behind me. I vow to surround myself around people who help me grow, motivate me and help me. I must say that I already have some fantastic people in my life, why complicate this system. I also have the gift of meeting crazies, and smilers.

I want to thank DK for giving me a fresh breath of air again. You are a great smiler and inspiration to my life. I also would like to thank all the people I have met in the past and the ones I will meet in the future, you keep me entertained and knowledgeable.

Humans now go smile, make a difference. HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011 is already fantastic!!!

Its the beginning of time....FALL

2010-08-24T06:39:00.000-05:00

I could not be more thankful at this moment. I have been dreaming of the 70 degree year round weather of SAN DIEGO for years. However this is my first fall in Chicago in 3 years and it reminds me how much I love it. Yes fall hasn't completely hit us yet, but its starting and it feels "fantastical." :) All the layers, sweaters, the leaves changing, and that awesome brisk air that hits your face, puts the biggest smile on my face.

I think this all started since I was a young child. Fall for me means a new start. (I guess this could apply to any season.) Just think about it for a second, since we were young we started school at the beginning of each fall, we started many sports, clubs, new friendships, new classrooms, new teachers, new clothes, shoes, the beginning of productive activies, etc... You get the point. I seriously get butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it. It reminds me of high school football, as I marched midfield on the football field playing my clarient.

Spectacular colors everywhere, its like the life of a city is born again. Everyone is out, vacations are over, bustling cities wide awake. I, my friends, am the "weird girl" walking around with a huge smile for absolutely no reason whatsoever! I don't even notice it, it just happens:)

It such a carefree time. "Young folks" by peter bjorn and john comes to my head. The good old UIC days living it up in Little Italy. Living in Chicago, so full of mysteries and adventures. There is always a memorable time in fall. But the amazing thing is not the past, its the new memories I will create this year.

For my little heart's sake please go out and enjoy fall, go running, sit by the window with your favorite sweater and a glass of red vino. I don't care just feel the start of something new.

To Beach or not to BEach?

2010-08-08T05:24:00.000-05:00

It seems that my brain comes up with my deepest thoughts at this hour. A crazy sense of emotions with unanswered questions. There have been many, and I mean MANY times where I have wanted to be in my "own" little world. Where I could choose the people, live in a different country and not deal with others.

As I watched the movie ~The Beach~ I realized why this would not work. A secret place that no one knows about except those people living there with you. You forget what reality is, you began to create what you believe is real. You cannot grow! (Anyone want to go to Thailand? j/k) The funny thing is desire is desire wherever you go.

How can one convince themselves that what others do is wrong and blindly see pass your own "wrong?" However when that realization comes, when one can truly realize that what they are telling another is the same thing they should be working on, well that my friend is growth.

We can be too naive in this life to think that we are great, boast to believe what we do is greater than what others do. A sort of self accomplishment. I know this may sound like a huge question, but it really isn't. What is our purpose? To show how great we are, to prove we can do it better than the other? What accomplishments we can complete? Of course not, why can't we realize the simple answer to this question and why, oh why is it so hard to except the answer? That void can only be filled temporarily.

VOID= Not occupied; unfilled.Completely lacking; devoid

Melacholy

2010-07-20T05:27:00.000-05:00

I was going to name this blog Melancholy, however I was greatly mistaken as to what it meant till I researched it. I thought it was something along the line of feeling not happy nor sad, but perhaps a bit of an uplifting to this content feeling. Nope.

Here are just a few:
(n.) Great and continued depression of spirits, amounting to mental unsoundness; melancholia.

(a.) Producing great evil and grief; causing dejection; calamitous; afflictive; as, a melancholy event.

(n.) Ill nature.

(n.) Depression of spirits; a gloomy state continuing a considerable time; deep dejection; gloominess.

(a.) Somewhat deranged in mind; having the judgement impaired.

(a.) Depressed in spirits; dejected; gloomy dismal.

Very depressing in fact. The one I highlighted quite disturbing.

Death cab for cutie makes me feel pensive, and a tingly feeling inside but not excited, just excited for something to happen.

I also realized that I usually start my blogs with questions, and the topic tend to be quite random. But that is how my brain works. I have so much inside that just gives spurts of information at any given time.

I feel content, its a strange feeling. Things seem to be in place, yet I want something I do not need right now. Patience I tell myself.

Sleep could cause my job, yet I am awake when the rest of the world sleeps. (Or at least it seems as though the rest of the world is asleep.)

Death cab makes me want to run through a field of flowers in a dress while the sun is out, however it must be windy. Very, very windy.

I am raising baby ducks, they are adorable and lots of work. They are aggressive and do not comprise. I wish I didn't compromise sometimes. They are innocent yet brilliant little creatures.

Can gloomy be a good feeling? Maybe melancholy isn't so bad. Speaking of Melancholy I am studying spontaneity in class right now. Delta S increases when the ions are sporadic and unorganized.

Lies to Disaster....

2010-06-26T04:39:00.000-05:00

I came across something different in my life. A point of no return. I know your thinking people cross this point all the time right? Well honestly I do not think I have had a "REAL" point of no return.

I 've met a lot of inspiring people. People who sweep me off my feet, and help me grow. Amazing people that do not hinder your self being, but sow seeds within you. I like to keep these folks close, no matter who they are. Positive influences is like a shot of expresso, such an energy booster.

Have you ever had such high regards for someone, or been so intrigued and passionate about a person? But somehow that value or view diminishes? The stranger thing is not that that person did anything different for your view to change. So how can our view change so drastically? How can time really lead to "eyes wide open?" Why couldn't this feeling be there from the beginning? Second chances are often given, thirds as well. However a second chance is gone! No Point of return.

Sometimes the things you want, are not the things you need. Sometimes the things other have, are really not the things you should want.

I am at the point of no return, and in a bit of confusion. How can you feel the way you felt and then not really care, or even feel like that at all. Emotions seem so tainted, so vain at points! so blahhhhhhhh.

You had me impressed and now you are a piece of green grass, just like the rest of the patch. No difference, just sitting there in the mist. No influence to offer, not impressive, not worth the time to sow or grow.

To think someone is so amazing and to realize that they are just your oridnary human being with good gestures is a huge difference.

Sometimes I tend to think that I just can't see beyond the good and somehow skip the negativity. How? How can one just skip the negativity and create only good things in their mind's?

I suppose the only thing now is to cherish the good times you spent with that individual.
I never thought that I would have a sense of a "ehhhhhhh or ughhhhh" type of feeling.

Ignorance leads to bliss.
Bliss leads to denial.
Denial leads to lies.
Lies to Disaster.
Disaster to pain.
Pain to resentment.

I cannot help but say I am disappointed, disappointed in the poor choices of human decisions. Why must the blind fold exist? Disappoint of a beautiful disaster.

Learn, lets learn, so that we are not blind folded. The mischievious can only conquer for a very short time.

To do nothing at all, yet see the truth is more of an accomplishment than changing what cannot be changed :)

StRaNgEr,sTrAnGeR

2010-06-22T02:33:00.002-05:00

California hippie
Originally uploaded by squidlips13

Have you ever kept in touch with a stanger?
Have they intrigued you?

When I say stranger I mean someone you know completely nothing about.

What sparks our minds? What keeps us curious about this particular individual. Companionship is inevitable. Why must we unlearn what we have learned? We are often told "to stay away from strangers."

But the untold stories of that human being could be the inspiration you need, unsolved mysteries, or the best friend you will ever make.....

Learn to unlearn, be risky, be free...

Reveal yourself.

What is this woman's story? Are you curious?

I am on a mission to find the real meaning of love. The type of love the bible speaks off.....

Water films and techno mexican band music?!?!?!

2010-05-21T10:20:00.000-05:00

I have not gone out in quite a while, I have been so caught up with work and school that I haven't even gone to catch a movie. NOTHING. So as my little friend Diana decided to invite me to the opening gala of the HOLA MEXICAN FILM FESTIVAL I decided I would join her since I needed to get out. (This is not a review as to whether or not you should watch, everyone should go and make their own opinion but I will tell you mine.)

Anyhow the festival consisted of 10 short films. Some were pretty amazing for how short they were but some were creepy, odd and scary. For example one of the films was these 3 people 2 guys and 1 girls. The whole complex had an intercom and a women kept speaking over it about how no one should go out in the sunlight because of the contagious disease, so these 3, not together, but seperately, would go out in the daylight in black suits and stay in the shade and if they hit sun they would run through it not letting their skin hit it. Anyhow at one point they all decide to let the sun hit their skin where they get loopy but happy. Somehow they all end up at the beach and both guys want the girl, she gets naked and runs into the ocean so they both get naked and run into the ocean. THE END.... what in the world. I don't get the point of it, nope not me. Wait but what would the point of that be? Lets get naked when in doubt of a disease? RIDICULOUS, but oh well, I guess that is the creative side of these film makers. I guess I can't blame them either since they only had 24 hours to make these short films.
Some were hilarious, like the one were this girl goes to playa del carmen all by herself since no one will go with her. She somehow loses her glasses and everything is a blur to her. She ends up going to get a bite to eat, where this guy knows her and strikes up a conversation she pretends to know him because she can't really tell what he looks like since she doesn't have her glasses, she ends up going on a date with him and when she wakes up in the morning she gets a delivery. The glasses have come in the mail, she puts them on and realizes its some guy she knew years ago in which she is diguested with and tells him to get out. She later goes to have dinner and is cleaning her glasses when all of sudden another guy comes up to her and he sounds interesting so instead of putting her glasses back on she puts them away to make things a bit more interesting for herself. Anyhow this one is really funny.

After the short films they were having free food and beverages with a band at green dolphin. First the process was a bit ridiculous to get in. We had these obnoxious blue flashing bracelets that we had to wear in order to get in for free, but we went to the main door and this lady got all crazy with the guy in front saying she didn't care whether they had a bracelet or not he had to pay $10 bucks. I started flashing the bracelet more to kind of get it across her head that the bracelet was gonna flash and I wasn't going to pay, we finally got in through the side door, super shady..ha
WOW, when they said free food I thought they meant free appetizers, no, not this film maker he went all out and had chipotle burritos in boxes for the masses. I wasn't sure whether to feel like a person who stands in line at a food pantry for some food, or whether to think does this guy know that chipotle is not "really" mexican food? Either way I love me some chipotle so I took my chicken burrito and ate on the dance floor, which was also a little awkard considering the band came on and people were dancing, while my rice from my burrito kept making to the floor. Diana and I ate the burrito not all of it, but we couldn't believe we were eating burritos at a night club.

And yes it gets better, as we ate our burritos, we thought the band from san diego would be a spanish rock band. But to our amazing surprise it was a band with the full on cowboy boots and hats, but with black sharp suits. But this "Mexican band" had a twist of course, because the whole night was full of interesting disaters. The Mexican band had a real guy playing the acordian, however they mixed all the music with techno beats, not sure what genre this falls into, but those beats got me all confused. Was I supposed to do my "fist pump", or should I dance with my flashing bracelet as if it were a glow stick, or am I supposed to dance like the regular mexican banda bands dance? So D and I decided to mimic others. We had a blast, we thought we could incorporate everyones dance moves, but it was too wild for one combined move. We had head bangers, in their artsy clothes, other dancing like the "normal" mexican music should be, some having a mosh pit, I guess this is a great way to combine everyones style or really offend true music lovers.

Shortly after they opened the back room, which had hip hop music and no Latinos, we decided to run back their in order to save the little musical appetite that we had left. As we rushed back their, to our surprise, the people in that back room were astonished, they slowly got up from their tables and walked toward the room with the band. Their mouths were opened as if they were in the zoo and had never seen such behavior. I heard a girl say "wow they have a band and everything, I have never seen anything like this." I told her we are running away from this and you should too, she said "but I can't believe it, I have never seen something like this." It seems as though they were under a spell slowly walking toward the band..haha It was pretty hilarious.

Then we decided to meet a friend at Vain, where it was the complete opposite. People were not dancing they were sitting as if though they were so bored. But why, I say, why? The music was better, the crowd was supposed to like it. But why did I ask that question, shortly after it became scandalous. It was as if I was the zoombie amazed by what the zoo animals were doing. Short skin tight dresses, slowly moving up as they bend over and rub all over their partner. Ha I had to get out of here. As poor little D was uncomfortable because of some party she had hosted for her work there. It was a zoo of events last night. To top it off we are driving home and these guys roll their windows down trying to drive with us to say something. I tell D that she should also roll her window down so that way we can just get it over with. We rolled the window down I waved at the boys and they were surprised I think they were expecting that response. But at this point I didn't care things couldn't get crazier than what we had seen. It was hilarious.

So the lesson here is this is what happens when you do not go out in a long time, every crazy thing happens in one night. BEWARE for the zoo in your neighborhood!

Boy oh Boy how time flys!!!!

2010-05-08T01:23:00.000-05:00

I remember just 2 months ago when I was keeping up with this blogging session :) There is so much I have been wanting to write, some funny things but can't think of any now probably because they were all in my short term memory.

However school is almost done 2 finals next week and I am free for about 3 weeks. Its been a bit brutal people I am not going to lie! So as of now I am trying to get into an EMT class for the summer, perhaps I will be saving lives soon :) ha maybe. I have planned a few trips this summer, since I have been hard at work and no time for play. I am going to sliver lakes in Michigan for some camping fun. I will be going to Key west in August for some fun in the sun or as I would say too much heat for this girl. Finally I will hopefully be going to Peru in November, not too shabby for this traveling addict :) Perhaps I can do a bit more research and figure out the hike on machi pichu...

So I have started this medical security job third shift. I thought I would be dying in the morning when I get off at 6:30am but not so shabby folks. Its actually quite peaceful and relaxing.

I feel like I am blabbling on right now, I guess I have nothing to say perhaps because its late. Till next time!

Life is not so Easy

2010-03-09T10:15:00.000-06:00

Today as I drove to work there was a thick fog outside, almost to the point you really could not see unless someone was driving with their lights on and that was even vague. It was crazy as I parked it seemed like an isolated town, very eery, no one was around in the streets. It felt like out of some crazy zombie movie. Ha

It made me thick of life itself. When things are hard no one wants to deal with them, some go into hiding, very solemnly will you see a few fighting hard. That was like this fog outside today, there was almost no one in sight except one man walking in the street. It was pretty cool and creepy.

However I have found myself in a recent struggle. I have no reason to not focus right now, especially on the things I want to work on. I have been put in situations that put all this positivity and good people around me. But for some reason I miss the opportunities at time. At work things are good I, the people are good, I am focused. In school, I seem to be advising people who have been in trouble, I am not sure why but its not getting me trouble. In small group they are awesome people, but I do not find the time to go sometimes.

Its crazy to think how hard we can make things for ourselves sometimes. And as for now I keep finding myself being tempted into really appealing things that I hope not to fall into but they just seem so damn good. Its a struggle I deal with everyday for the past couple weeks. The temptor or my desires are working overtime. Ha But my conscience is saying do the good, its the struggle between good and evil..haha (In other words.) For now I will try to be like those few who fight and do not run away...ha

Have a good day people and fight!

In the State of pure sunshine predators and beasts come out!!!

2010-02-23T12:10:00.001-06:00

So this past weekend I went to South Beach for some fun in the sun and of course my sister's bachelorette party. It seemed like months in planning but it was defintely a great time.

I first want to introduce some of the people who were there. Jessica of course my sister who loves attention and is quite the dancer. I call her the wild child not in a hippie type or out of control, but shes petite and capable of getting herself in some trouble. Like those small children that crawl under the table and spill drinks over... Next is Lisa she is very humorous in a sarcastic way. She thinks she whispering when she is making comments but everyone can hear and although its hilarious its probably not appropiate it. She does have that admirable quality of TELL-IT-LIKE-IT-IS! Another one that came out was corina shes the quiet, semi-tame one of the bunch. She doesn't like fighting. ha

So just a few of the peeps but you get the point. I have been to Miami many times, not typically going out to these crazy night clubs but you do get to enjoy yourself out there. This time though I made some new discoveries, they were quite funny but pretty darn ridiculous. The first night out was when the predators came for us in packs and really hard. We went to check out Mango's Tropical cafe- or so I think that is what it is called. I had always walked by and seen men and women dancing on the stage as part of a salsa show or whatever.(By the way all their outfits are cheetah style.) So I finally went in this time and we decided to go upstairs where it was less crowded. This is probably what triggered the creepy night owl's. We were just minding our business dancing our little lives away when all of sudden our big open circle of 4 became a squished circle of four. As we all looked around for a second we were being attacked by "junk rubbers" in all directions. I am a very passive person however I had to literally push one dude away and I had to signal him "NO." I think he was a little upset and extremely wasted, he was so ridiculous, I couldn't understand why his friends would let him make a fool of himself. But there was this old hulk hogan looking dude with actually blond curly hair up to his shoulders with a pretty sweet cougar. Ha or so she seemed like it. They looked like they were right out of the 80's in hawaii with their flowered up shirts, beautiful site. ha I will try to post the picture of him later. Worth the time.

So the next day we went to a place called Mansion, hence I am not really into clubbing. It was a bunch of people pretending to be super rich with VIP tables everywhere and snooty girls walking around like super models, most half naked with no undies. They must of not gotten the memo that although Britney did it years ago the trend is over folks. We might have gotten ourselves in a pickle here. Some friendly people invited us over to their VIP section, so we went for it, we later realized that although we just wanted to dance, one guy was claiming Lisa as though it was his property. I saw Lisa's face and died laughing. She was ready to punch this guy. We later noticed what one guy was doing to this coked out blondie with no undies on the couch. I can't even go into detail, but right after we quickly walked away this could of happened to Lisa (J/k) ha. Anyways we later decided to make our own VIP area.

Later that night as we walked home, there were tons of predators out and about (or so that is what I call them). Lisa was definitely causing a ruckous because all these guys were after her :) One even yelled out, "I will suck your a*s" At this point I laughing uncontrollably. (Sorry lisa had to mention this.) I mean what guy in their right mind thinks it is appropiate to yell this and a girl will turn around and say ok sure?!?!

My favorite of this weekend though were the Xena warrior princesses not one but two. They had their hair in braids and pig tails with a head band around their head. They look like German girls, they were not one to mess with. They were fantastic, the guys they were dancing with were tiny compared to this tough chicks. Awesome discovery.

Last but not least, who can leave south beach without seeing girls of all shapes and sizes wearing next to nothing, literally most of them should not be wearing those things, or should be wearing more. But I guess nude is in Miami. We were shopping at intermix, when a woman no doubt about 40 years old came in with "shorts she would call them" but basically underwear on and leaving nothing to the imagination. We did start a new trend though at the last place we went to, as the rest of the girls flew in we went out and danced our lives away and had some good "fist pumps" in there which made everyone else wonder what we were doing. So they joined us and everyone there was fist pumping to the max!!! ha Hilarious how people we continue the flow of random things.

As my sister enjoyed her last month as a "single" chick...men in the streets begged her not to get married. You may be wondering how would they know?! Well we made her wear a blinking pink sash that blinded everyone in the night time. It was clearly hilarious seeing men go on their knees in the street of Miami and tell her to rethink the situation. Madness.

We made new discoveries in Miami, of this crazy world and the culture of Miami. Now we can put that to rest :)

Pictures coming soon...

Wake up its a New Day

2010-02-17T11:16:00.001-06:00

In a world like ours, its so hard to trust, and find good people. You always hear us complaining about how someone did us wrong, or what so and so did. I really believe its rare to hear people talk about the amazing things they witnessed someone else do.

I usually tend to find the good in people. However I fall into the trap sometimes of looking at the bad. A few posts ago I spoke about an amazing person I met a few months ago, someone like I had not met ever. I am still very excited about my new discovery and yet keep meeting good people. Infact this same person I found to be an extrodinary person once told me, they had a significant other that was "too happy" all the time and this made them not as happy because they never got the opportunity to be happy. I know sounds strange a bit but this person is fantastic.

I feel like that happy person they spoke about is ME now, recently these past couple weeks, I have an abundant of joy that I can not even explain. It is strange I haven't felt this good in a long time. I mean I felt good, but not like this perturding joy.

I think part of this is because I am in a really good place right now, I have such amazing people that I am surrounded around almost every single day. The people I work with are not toxic, but joyous, they really are super. Even my "new friends" -classmates I have made are really good. My group on Wednesdays are filled with beautiful (relationships) couples who are the perfect example of a truly happy marriage. So can you see why I am so happy? Everyone around me is a perfect example of what life should be in this world.

A friend e-mailed me this article a week ago and I finally read it and it was fanastic. It reminded me of that unusally extrodinary friend I made a few months ago that I cannot explain either. Have you ever found a person that you absolutely have nothing bad to say about, there seriously is nothing bad that even comes to mind to say? Thats it, thats who I have found :)

Anyways I wanted to share the article and hopefully you have some people like this in your life :) It makes me happy to read this article and find hope in humanity.

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/life/6-personality-traits-to-admire-and-acquire-576756/

Go out friends and discover the good the most high has for us.

So rise up my friends!!

Oh happy day :)

A new start

2010-02-12T10:17:00.000-06:00

This week has been super duper busy. I forgot what it was like for a second to actually work and go to school at the same time. I love it though, as much as I am tired and stressed sometimes I love everything about school and work is coming around. It defintely has its good points.

So I am into my 4th week of school and I must say Anatomy is taking up so much of my time, but I am addicted to it. I feel good about the things I am learning :) We got our quiz and another test back a couple days ago and I totally aced it. I looked around at some disappointed faces. I felt really good about the time I had put into studying this stuff. I later went to meet with some of my classmates to study for the test we had yesterday. However I felt like a show off because I knew all the stuff and they did not know any of it. The thing is I wanted them to learn I wanted them to know, but if they don't go home and read it how can they be prepared.

Anyhow so I met a girl in my class, shes a really really nice girl. We have a lot in common and we just found out that we go to the same church. So it is a good thing. She is married, which is a bit different then me but were the same age so have similar interests. Anyways I am really excited about becoming friends with her. We decided to volunteer together and go to church together. She is really genuinely good, I am excited about the things to come. She has a friend that is also in class and I remember thinking how familiar she looked but I couldn't pin down from where. I finally found out that she was my manager from Kohl's when i worked there in High school, how random is that? Now she is in my class.

So yesterday I was waiting for my lab to open up so that I could take my Chemistry exam. As I waited a girl came and sat next to me with her lab partner and these 2 guys. This is a ridiculous story.

Girl: So your Mexican right, No No your not!
Me: No, I am Honduran
Girl: Oh well why do you talk white.
(Really you just asked if I was mexican and now I talk white?!?!?!)
Me: Um... (kind of speechless)
Girl: Well what I mean is that when I looked at you I assumed you were white.
Me: (I shake my head)
Girl: But I mean where are your parents from one must be from here
Me: Both of my parents were born in Honduras
Girl: Oh because one of mine was born here and people tell me that sometimes,
(Girl what the heck are you on!!! How rude are you!! )
*Her friend tells her to stop she shouldnt be asking those questions
Me: Nope they were both born there. I learned spanish first and then english
Boy standing in corner: But you lost it right? Thats what happened to me I learned it and I lost it.
Me: No I still speak spanish
Girl: Really, then say something!! Say a Sentence.
Me: Um...
Girl: come on say I hate school
Me.: Am I being interviewd for something weird?!?!
Girl: Oh I see. How old are you
Me: (Laughing seriously lauighing because this can't be real) I am 25
Girl: Are you serious, you look like your 19.
Me: Well I have never heard that before. (I am dressed in Business attire from work)
Girl: Do you work, what do you do?
Me: (I am literally confused and walked away)

What kind of idoits are in my class. I can't figure it out was this girl genuniely asking and believed there was nothing wrong with what she was asking? Or was she being a jackass?

I walked away from the 20 year old and decided I would let her have her fun, as I focused on more important things.

I want to tell you guys about my awesome co-workers. I have 3 besides my boss, but I really get along with 2 of them. One is this lady who I just adore. She brings me fried chicken and coke and chips...and all those bad things I shouldn't eat. She treats me like if I were her child or something. She volunteers at the jail to minister to women. Anyways I had to tell her yesterday that I was on a diet because I am afraid with all her FRIED chicken goodness that I am going to be a roly poly soon. ha Then there is an old man who is the dearest old thing. He is hilarious and jokes around all th etime. He is always looking out for the both of us. I must say I really scored the jackpot with this job.

I am in a great place people... Praise God.

Stinky= No good!

2010-02-03T22:16:00.000-06:00

So talk about being extremely bored just a couple weeks ago, to having so much to do that I don't know where all the time goes.
I started my new job today, I hate when you start a new job, its the same thing, here is the manual or bible of the job, sit at the desk and read it! Ok thanks I will pretend that I am reading for 2 hours while I play on the phone...haha
Anyhow I have decided that my life is out to get me. I mean it is seriously on this path of FOCUS! No time for play just focus, which I can for once say this is really good. I can of course thank my mighty God. The reason I say this is my new job, I have an office (weird for me) I have had a cubical but never an office. Anyways I work with 3 older people who are nice, fun, and seem to fight with eachother just as you would expect old people to do. (That was seriously in a non- offensive matter.)

There are no young people my age, which makes me foucs, on my job. There are no attractive or intresting young men in my classes which leads me to all business which leads to focus. Well and besides I like to focus on what I am studying. I am seriously alright with all of this.

But I will tell you what I am NOT alright with. As I went to the gym today with total determination of an hour of cardio and some upper body weights, it somewhat failed in the middle. So I met up with my friend Brandi, I had no intentions of trying to do the stair masters, I just wanted to run for a long time. But I knew it was time to hit the stairs again, so before that we did some upper body weights. After we hit that AWESOME(not really) and glorious stair master for 30 mins at a ridiculous level. Of course after this I was exhausted but I was determined to hit that treadmill. I went for the only one that was open. I should have realized why it was open. I really should have but I had no clue what I was getting myself too.

As I started to run, I got this awful whiff (not sure if that is how you spell that) of something. I started to look around it was this NASTY, overweight man, walking on the treadmill next to me. I mean it smelled like the worse armpits ever because he kept lifting his arms to wipe his face like he didn't smell that.

*Side note: Many of you know that I gag with just the look of jello, or an awful smell. *

So as you can see I am a HUGE gagger when things are gross. So I convinced my brain that it wasn't bad and I needed to focus on my run. I kept trying to bring my towel to my mouth so I could smell the downy freshness. But as you can imagine there is only so many times you can this. I was done with a mile and I was dying, DYING with the smell and a bit exhausted from the stairs. I told myself to keep going. I saw the treadmill on the other side of this man quickly open up. I saw another man walking to it and I just wanted to tell him RUN, RUn for your life it is a war zone of the most awful smell you can imagine. Please for your own sake go. But the words did not come out of my mouth. You know why? Because I tried to keep my mouth closed the whole time because I didn't want to throw up or gag. I stared at him with a piercing eye, but he was not leaving anytime soon. I was so annoyed that he was walking and smelled this bad.

HOW CAN YOU NOT SMELL YOURSELF? It was bad, he wore a cut of shirt, so his hairy armpits were at full disclosure. So after 15 horrific minutes I quit. I ran away as fast as I could and then decided to sit downstairs and watch the guy running next to him. I wanted to see if that guy was making faces to display his digust of the smell. I spoke to Brandi about the situation, as she looked up to see the guy, she started laughing. I was confused, she said you are a trooper, she said she was running the other day and he came to run next to her, when there was all these treadmills open and she could not bare his smell after a min and walked away. It was funny alright, but my motivation was gone!!!

Blah this is reminding me of having to see the guy in my class tmrw!!! NO I don't want to. Blah

Fullfilled, thrilled, and Jubilant.

2010-02-02T21:48:00.001-06:00

Just a few words to describe my feelings this week. What a weekend to beginning of week it has been. I attended a Thrive conference at my college this weekend. I really believed it would be extremely boring and I only went because I got credit for going. However when I entered inside the room and sat down, I was literally blown away. I could not help but feel so motivated. I was intrigued by the speakers, I wanted to run around in circles with all the joy I was feeling. This conference reassured my goals and my confidence to achieve them. Who knew your ordinary professor and deans had so much wisdom. Ha funny no?

Anyways the excitement doesn't end there. Although the decisions of this weekend led to sleep deprivation due to my sister's birthday and scheduling myself for more than I should have, I am stressed and tired. But for some reason this joyous feeling will not go away, I can't keep the smile away.

I went to the gym today and beat my running record again. 5 miles in 46 mins. I usually run 10:30 miles so to bring it down to 9:20 ish mins is pretty damn good if I may say so myself. I hope to be at 42 mins next week. Now I can't wait for spring to get here so I can run for miles and miles, there is only so much you can do on the tread mill....blah for stupid treadmills. No nature to see, no birds chirping (I like to bird watch) no fresh air, and just boring old TV in front of your face that you can't even hear.

So after my awesome run and stair climb I went off to Anatomy. We learned all about the layers of skin that we have. Did you know that 75% of dust is dead skin cells...yummmi. Who loves to clean dust?!?! Anyhow this guy came in LATE and sat next to me. I am intrigued so I sit in the front road close to the projector. This guy the only guy in the class decides to sit next to me. BLAH, I don't want this guy next to me, I just want to focus. He makes it a point to try to answer a lot of the questions, so whatever right?!? I mind my own business. At the end of class the professors announces that we will have a quiz on Thursday and begins to mention things that we might see on the quiz. I, being the good student that I am, decide to jot a few things down so that I can review them later. This guy keeps looking at what I am writing as though he doesn't hear the professor saying the same thing. It was really annoying. Besides I was writing really fast so it was sloppy,I hate when people look at my writing and it is sloppy.
He starts to ask me what I wrote and I annoyingly point to the board. I sound like I am being a bit harsh, but I assure I am not. I had already explained to him a bit of what I wrote before. So then I realized he was just trying to make conversation.
Which I am sorry but I do not have time to just make conversation with some random dude that I have no interest in. I am in class to learn not to mingle with the only Y chromosome other than the professor, Bob. This is somewhat of how my conversation went with him

Guy: That's a cool watch.
Me: Thanks, its my running watch.
Guy:Oh you run?
Me: Yes I run!
Guy: So your a runner?
Me: Yes, I like to run.
Guy: So are you doing nursing?
Me: No, I am doing a PA program
Guy: Oh is that a physical assistant?
Me: No its a Physician Assistant
Guy: Oh wow, I was going for that too.
Me: Oh yea PA is hard.
Guy: but now I am going to be a nutrionist
Me: (unintersted) Oh good. (trying to walk away)
- He proceeds to let me go in front of him and starts following me. BLAH what the heck.
So I look around to see who I can go talk to so I can get away.
I don't want to sit next to him, I don't want to talk to him. I am not interested in some love affair. I just want to learn about anatomy. Damn it, I need to not be so nice!

Seriously do you not get the point that I am not INTERESTED?!?!?!

Rambling

2010-02-02T00:36:00.000-06:00

Blah who needs time management!!! I am exhuasted. Apparently I did not do a good job this weekend of time management. I need sleep so it seems I will ramble a bit on here.

Mistakes- folks we need to learn to forgive.
Alcohol makes some people STUPID. I witnessed about 10 people get kicked out this weekend. They were dragged out as they kicked and raved about how they did not want to leave. They fell on the floor, they stumbled across the dance floor, they broke beer bottles...etc... I seriously witnessed all of this

I have now gone through 4 hours of straight chemistry. My brain is confused.

Oh I got a job this week. I am officially helping others from now until the job ends or at least I end:)

K night night

Human of the Year

2010-01-29T13:42:00.000-06:00

Nice title aaaaaaaa? There is no such thing as Human of the Year. If there was there would be perfection, and well lets face it folks were not perfect, no one is!

Anyhow I want to talk about an accomplishment I achieved today. I began running long distances 2 years ago when I decided to train for the Akron, Ohio Marathon. All 26.2 miles...

Anyhow I learned to pace myself because when you run for that long you don't sprint the whole thing. So at that time I was running 10min 45 sec miles potentially sometimes at 10:30 mins. So typically a 3 miles run would be under 33 mins. Anyways I have started training for this stair climb that I am doing next month. So I started running a few weeks ago. Boy was I not in the same shape I was on that glorious day when I ran the marathon.

Its funny to think how I can think that only because I use to run 20-30 miles a week I can defintely run 3 miles with no problems now, even though I hadn't ran in months. This made me think of life in general if you don't practice something or commit time to it, you do not get better at it.

Anyhow so the past 3 weeks I have been running, working out, spin class etc. Today I was on some crazy hype. I don't know what happened but I decided to run at one speed today, usually I move up and down. So I stared at 5.8 and quickly moved to 6.0. My little brother was running next to me, so I wanted to prove that I was a runner. The funny thing is today was not really a day that I needed motivation from someone else. I usually tend to run and find someone else I want to beat and this works with my training.

But today was different I was on another level. I started at this speed and gradually moved up and was not tired I just did the whole thing. I ran 3 miles today in 27 mins and 40 secs and ended at 8.0 speed, I am pretty sure I have never ran 3 miles in this amount of time or speed. It was awesome and I could have kept going but then it was time to lift some weights with my bro.

So perhaps I am not the Human of the Year but I felt like a one.

Regina Spektor and I..eet, eet, eet!!!!

2010-01-29T00:05:00.001-06:00

Who is Regina Spektor you might ask?! I want to tell you a little bit about her. She is was born in Russia in 1980. Her family left in 1989, when Regina was nine and a half at this time Soviets were allowed to emigrate. There was a lot of political discriminate against Jewish people, which a desicion as to why her parents left the country.  She is spectaculor. She is Jewish and therefore reads Hebrew and is fluent in Russian. She is so talented. If you have ever heard her album 11:11 she speaks in french and russian, as well in English. But she uses her languages and different sounds in all of her music.

What is fancisnating about Regina is that she never planned on singing. She played the piano in Russia and was into classical music. When she move to New York at a young age, she continued her studies with the Piano in the synagogue in the basement since they did not bring their original piano from Russia. She later found out that she just kept writing all these songs and begin singing in NY. Which leads us to this great musician.

Anyhow my first encounter with Regina was August 2007. I was at lollapoolza in Chicago. I remember looking at the line up of over 100 bands. I told myself I would check her out. I remember getting some of my friends into this music festival (I won't explain how I got them in but I did ;). Anyhow I remember yelling at my 2 friends as I rushed to the stage to see Regina performing. I said, "Come guys its Regina at this stage," I remember never seeing Regina in a picture or real life. I also never heard of her before then. I remember after yelling at my friends to hurry so that we could see her, there was this women who was staring at me. Seriously what is the first thing you do when someone stares at you?! Well the I did the obvious and turned around to see if she was really looking at someone else. I was only a few feet away from this stranger. They gave this warm and sincere smile. It made me feel uncomfortable because I didn't know who she was. She stared at me and waited, as though I was supposed to go to her. I couldn't understand why she was only smiling at me when there were hundreds if not thousands of people at this festival. It was like time stopped and only her and I were standing there. Her smile was so innocent yet so creepy for me because I didn't know why she was smiling at me. My friends finally caught up with me and I told come on guys lets get out of here. I remember by the time we got to the stage we couldn't get close up. When I saw Regina walk on stage I wanted to hit my head against the wall. Regina had heard me yell at my friends to hurry to go to the stage she was playing at and waited there with a smile for me to approach her. I didn't know who she was and had given her a confused but yet disturbed look. She probably did not understand why I was not running towards her. Anyhow I can never forget that look on her face, that sweet smile.

Now 3 years later I am completely obsessed with her. To think I had my chance and I didn't even know it then. I probably still wouldn't run to her, but I must say its crazy to think you never know who your meeting or who you will run into. Everyone is somebody right. They may just be famous later on. Anyhow
she just came out with a new album in June of last year. I can't get enough of her.

So go listen to her angelica voice, her sweet melodies, her relaxing tunes. Find the joy and peace through her music. Here are some of my favorite songs.

Song                   Album
Eet                      Far 2009
Better                   Begin to Hope
Samson                Begin to Hope
Apre Moi             Begin to Hope
Hero                   Begin To Hope
Rejazz                 11:11
Us                      Soviet Krisch
Love Affair         11:11
Pavlov's Daughter 11:11

I like all the 11:11 album songs :)

Enjoy

UNTIL THE WHOLE WORLD HEARS

2010-01-28T10:50:00.000-06:00

Today I made a lot of future friends. Will I hope they will be some close friends in the future. The thing about friends is you need to nuture the relationship at the beginning. You have to spend time and work hard in order to get closer, this could be with anything, friends, spouse, sisters, brothers, etc...

I went to a small group today. When I got their I was the first one and I figured I was at the wrong place because no one was there. Finally some guy walked in and was opening the door that pointed to the room I had been informed to go to when I had arrived. So I asked him if he was Jim (that is who I had been emailing back and forth in order to attend this group) he said yea who are you, I said Helen and he said Helen who? So I thought could this guy not remember me? I felt weird. He gave me the keys to the room downstairs. I later realized that he was Jim but not the Jim that I had spoken to over email, therefore that was the weird exchanges of our faces.

So after 20 mins everyone that attended this group was seated and I looked around I became a bit uneasy because I noticed that everyone was a couple except myself. I came all by lonesome and everyone had a husband or wife there.

I noticed the close bond these people had to eachother, they chatted with eachother for about half another before we even got started. I was warned by the Jim I met at the door that they tend to talk a lot and that this was the best group I could have joined. So once we got into the study of our spiritual growth with Christ. I must say it was intimidating talking to complete strangers about a study that is this personal. The good thing is you do not have to say anything you can just listen. So at one point I felt as though this was like one of those alcoholic anonymous meetings that everyone sits around and talks about their problems. However after a few mintues I warmed up to them and I couldn't stop talking about our study. I realized that I was probably the youngest in the group. I also realized that even though I had less life experience and in my head I thought that these people would be all incredibly experienced Christians they weren't. Some are going through serious problems, some have fought a good fight to be in the excellent condition they are.

Its funny to think about this analogy but its like school when there is a lot of different ethnic groups, or different levels of understanding in one classroom. This was like a bunch of different people in different specific area of spiritual growth, we were all at different places in our lives, but we have eachother to encourage ourselves. I shortly realized that for some reason, as hard as I had tried in the past to join one of these groups and I couldnt get into one, I was at the right group. I was so excited that I had gone by myself and met all these people. I am definetly fond of a few couples but the one that sticks out the most is the one with the norwegian husband. His accent is awesome and you can tell that he has had a lot of life experience. A lot of the things I went through or am going through he has dealt with.

These people are very nice and I look forward to having some of their wisdom. I also can't wait to share about my experiences with them. They are not only lovers of the Most High but they are adventurous old folks, there are 2 couples who love to go white water rafting, another couple loves camping in Florida. ha There is so much that I still have yet to uncover. The cool thing is they are like parents to me. They have some good advice.

So as I stated in one of my previous emails about challenging yourselves. I have ventured out of my comfort zone to go meet some strangers and boy oh boy this was an awesome experience. I leave you with one thought. If you have everything you need and want, but still feel a void, then you can agree there is something missing, even though it appears you are content with everything. Perhaps the missing puzzle is right in front of you. Go and search God even for just one day, but I mean really serach for him! I can asure you this will fill that void, it will change your life, you will feel and be a better person.

Peace folks!

Travel bug...what does that mean?!?!!?

2010-01-25T00:01:00.001-06:00

I have been bad with my emails or blog on this last tour I did in the past four months. I have been all over the west coast and down down south. So it seems as though I am back tracking a little but I am just filling in the gaps. Anyhow I traveled with 4 other people Kylie, Ryan, Jason, and Gavin. One other girl and 3 guys.

Here they are. I know madness. But regardless they were pretty cool kids. Anyhow I want to talk about Vegas or maybe no Vegas.

I didn't get to go to Vegas, NO I did not get to go. I had planned to go out there these past 4 months on my journey out west. I was convinced it would happen. This I have this thing about me. I plan... A LOT. I expect my plans to fall into place. I plan so that they work out. My plans usually go through, even if it failed in someway, it still happens. I have never had the desire to go to Vegas but I thought since I would be out west for 4 months I should do it. It seems silly since I have been to virtually over 300 cities. However the only reason I was not disappointed about my plan not falling into place, was because instead I got to go to the Grand Canyon.

I just thought about my awesome trip to the canyon a couple months ago. What a magical place. I never thought it would be that awesome. It really is true when it is said that words or pictures cannot describe it.

But I will attempt.

Anyways I got to go with Ryan and Kylie and we ended up staying in the canyon. We initally wanted to rent a cabin and have a fire roasting marshmellows and what not. But instead we got a room inside the canyon and it was awesome. We would walk out the door and and literally we were on the rim of the canyon, it was breath taking. I remember waking up and walking around the rim realizing how great the earth and nature is. Thank the mighty Creator. Anyways it really was a peaceful place and the funny part was we went there on our days off, but it felt like a vacation. We also got to go hiking into the canyon, we did 6 miles instead of the 12 all the way to the river. It was defintely a workout for me, going down was a breeze but coming up was rough and I loved every minute of it. I recommend everyone goes once.

So thinking of all the things I have done and seen in the past couple months. I have this unbearable case of the travel bug :) I can not stay in one place, but I have vowed to at least make it the next 4 months at home. I know I feel like an addict, just kidding. But I have made some plans as far as some things I want to do in the near future. I know this sounds crazy but I want to move to Jerusalem in Israel for at least between 1-3 months. I know why Jerusalem, you say?!?! I am so intrigued by this country. I love the food, the history, the intensity of soccer games, the passion of this culture.I know right now is not the time but I wll eventually get there.

Tel-aviv vs. Jerusalem game

The old city

I loved this graffiti solider when I saw it. It's such a fantastic picture in so many ways. The solider helping the child. The underlying symbols of graffit.

:)

Bikes

2010-01-22T22:58:00.002-06:00

This is an old pic of us in Argentina, its about 2 years ago. I love that we were out for hours in the heat riding our bikes. We stopped at some really old tracks where trains rarely run and we finally took a break.

Good bye Movies for real experiences

2010-01-22T11:03:00.001-06:00

Goodbye movies is right!!!! My lounging days are over folks. I used to watch a min.of 2 movies a day, now I lucky if I see one a week. But I am not disappointed because I am having my own movies playing in real life.

Wow... I can't get enough of the ridiculous things I have managed to encounter. I also can't wait to tell you all about it. This is my way of getting these horrific things out. I kid, I kid not horrific.

So I attended my classes again. College students are really immature or way to mature but in an immature way (I mean old like 40-50 yr olds) that the class setting seems to be a joke. So the youngens feel the need to be jackasses, you know where they whisper things and laugh or blurt out inappropiate comments and laugh. The old folks go around asking questions about everything, like can my paper be more than 5 pages long, or they go on about thier kids for hours. Sorry but no one wants to hear about your personal life when we only have an hour or two to learn. There really is no inbetween. It is quite an adventure.
My Pysch Professor would not stop talking about how she spent her winter break in Hawaii and the tempature was 85-87 degrees the entire time.
*(I am not trying to put labels on people such as nerdy, old, blonde etc.. however I am doing this in order to give you a better description, not for making fun of them PURPOSES :)

Anyhow so the girl who knows everything about the bookstore and library managed to ask the teacher if she could include those pictures from Hawaii in the class slides. That way she would get her 10 mins of Viatmin D?!?! What I really didn't think she was funny if that was her point. Anyhow we also have the loner girl with a lot of acne on her face which makes me believe that is why she sits in the corner, seriously all by herself. No one sat next to her, I think that might be my next mission to befriend her.

Oh and do not get me started on the old man with blonde long curly hair, well its to his shoulders, he has these glasses too and always wears a baseball cap. He kind of reminds you of a creepy guy praying on young children, hence were in child development class! And let me tell you this guy will not shut up, I get to the point where I stare him for long periods of time in hopes that he will catch a glimpse of my annoyed facial expressions. He seriously asked how to find his homework assignments, if he could get the topic of our paper in advance, what our lab classes meant? These are ok questions to ask after class. And finally folks I sit next to the coolest girls you will ever know. They are your super tanned blondes and when I say super tanned I mean orange, what a delightful color to present :) But it gets better they were wearing your black ugg boots, and your black northface jackets, they almost looked like twins. It was defintely the wrong day for me to wear my black northface. They are too cool for everyone in that class. You might think I am bad right now for merely describing my classroom, but they are literally making fun of everyone who even moves. I gave them a nod to let em know who's boss. Just kidding.

So after my lovely introductions I get to tell you what the teacher wanted us to discuss as a classroom after her "awesome" syllabus read through. She wanted us to make rules for the classroom so that we can learn productively. Here are some that my actual class mates said, "No loud eating", what?!?!?! "No texting", "Must participate in class", really because I am not sure I would want everyone in that class participating, anyways you get the point.
At the end of the class we saw a sweet 1980's video about childrens behavior, at one point they showed a baby slide out of a woman, I mean the full works it was nasty, all the fluids and stuff. It was so intense I am not sure if I want to have a child. I am sure one day I will appreciate that, but for the moment it was a good thing I hadn't ate anything because I would have puked. As a matter of fact I can tell you that for sure I do not want to have that video taped ever.

Then I get to my naughty class. Where we learn every single part of the body. We must learn the anatomical names. For example we must say mammary for breast or the perineal for the region between the anus and the external genitalia. We get to see all these pictures of naked people. While my cheeks (aka buccal) turn bright red, my classmates laugh when they see these things. Bob, my best professor yet, saids, "alright children go ahead and get your giggles out now, but you will get used to us saying penis, vagina, gluteal...etc.. without laughing ever again." He means it too, he gave us yesterday as a freebee day for this stuff but hes not joking around. He told us to get used to seeing "naughty pictures" ha. The anatmony is such an interesting topic I seriously think it should be a requirement for every single person to take this class. I love this class, regardless of my endless hours of studying I must put in it to remember everything.

Last but not least I had a 25 question exam in Chemistry. Whatttttttt it was like a foriegn language to me. I seriously guessed over half of those questions. I remembered how much I hated this subject and it doesn't help that our professor is as old as the dinosuars and goes through his lecture as though we also are as old as dinosuars and know everything. However to redeem myself I must say that I rocked our lab, I was done with all those questions in minutes and we do not even have to hand them in till next week. I know I know overacheiver you say, but I have learned that if you are not one step ahead you are actually one behind. I wish sometimes that I would have had the same mentality as when I was at UIC would have been a bit easier in the earlier years. Do not get me wrong I have always loved school, so I made it a priority but I am way better at studying now then I used to be.

I have a few options right now as far as work goes, but I will leave that for my next post because it is more of a dilemma right now :)

I leave you with hope of a great weekend.

First day of challenges.

2010-01-20T23:46:00.000-06:00

Wow what can I say Tuesday was the longest and most intimidating day of 2010.

Thats right as I arrived to school an hour early, I stood in a line to get into the bookstore to buy my books. I probably should have done that the week before but I didn't. Therefore I waited 30 mins to get in and another 30 mins to check out. Ridiculous I tell you.

Then I went to my first class, which I couldn't believe how much the professor talked about herself and her accomplishments. The funny part was how shes an instructor of child development and before she would tell us that she did not have children, she managed to tell us that she had 20 nieces and nephews, therefore she had tons of experiences with children because she discussed behavior with the parents?!?!?! Seriously what the heck right. But well see what happens.

Next off to my Anatomy and Physiology class. Boy oh boy was this very intimidating. The professor Bob was awesome, so enthusiastic, he made Bio sound like so much fun. However he warned us, that about 8 students of the 30 would drop the class because of how difficult it was. He said if we didn't have the time to not even bother. I was very mistaken when I thought it would be easier than taking this class at UIC. We then quickly realized that all the students were females, most going in to nursing. We apparently need to buy a medical dictionary and cannot spell anything wrong. Because in the real world you cannot spell incorrectly. The time commitment seems insane as I learned today from spending 5 hours going through the first chapter and lab and taking notes. But nonetheless I really enjoyed learning the proper terms of anatomy and learning a lot of the body and all the parts, organs, etc.

Lastly was my Chemistry class. Oh was this one making me sweat. Let me just say I LOVE school, I really do. I know that sounds weird. However after all these classes I was stressing out a bit. In chemistry we had an algebra quiz when we walked in. I love math, but I haven't done algebra in years so I managed to get the 2 out 3 problems one with the decimal in the wrong place and I couldn't even anwser number one. I don't know if I mentioned that I hate when professors at a college level think students should go around introducing themselves in class.
Which is exacly what Professor OOSTA made us do. But I liked his method a bit more, he made us find a partner get to them and then introduce them. I found out the 18 year old girl I was interviewing had an 18 month old baby. WOW. We had to mention an unsual fact about ourselves and that was hers. I found out that a guy named Javier could walk on his knees. I also felt like all these students were so much younger than me, but the good thing is none of them suspected I was older. Ha random I know

However I managed to strike up a conversation with 2 people in my Chem class I am hoping to refresh my math skills with them, or I will force them to do my homework...just kidding.

Oh some fun things, I have to buy chemisty goggles for 2 classes. I also must get my own pair of vinal gloves, an anatomy coloring book, I might have to get one of those dolls with all th ebody parts.

Anyhow I am looking forward to all the knowlegde I will gain on this crazy adventure I have thrown myself upon. My time commitment to these classes seem ridiculous.

2010 Watch out here I come.

2010-01-08T12:01:00.000-06:00

Alright so I agree it has been months since I have been blogging on here at least. So as the new year starts I figure why not write a fresh new blog.

***However I will warn you this is not something I wrote on some paper for a new year's resolution. In fact I decided not to write anything down, because I know what I want so its up to me this year to accomplish it. ***

Now to more important things! I recieved a book "Become a Better You" by Joel Osteen. I must admit that I have only read a few chapters and I really really like it. I like Joel's way of teaching. But I do have one complaint about this book, it seems to keep repeating the same message over and over but in different sentences. I am assuming because he wants to make sure you get the point. I must say I am a bit annoyed with reading the same point 10 times in one paragraph but I understand why he does what he does.

Next I have decided this year is about positive influences. My silly brain gets into thinking these crazy ideas sometimes but here I go. I am laying it out all on the table. Do people ever get sick of being so negative, not just to others but unto themselves? I wonder do people enjoy being down or negative all the time? Is it like a sick habit or addiction. I mean seriously how many times can you get down on yourself about how fat, ugly, lame, bad person, or how uncreative you are? First you must have more confidence in yourself. I mean it really sucks when people aren't even telling you these things, but for some reason YOU yourself are putting you down. Come on people its 2010 be POSITIVE, be good to yourselves. The truth is someone doesn't believe those awful things about you. Your are great, you are talented, you are not fat or ugly. Love yourselves, because if you do not then no one else can. Even if you are not the negative one but you surround yourself around these people then you too can fall into this unhealthy habit. So for this year I will be a friend from the distance to those negative people, because I refuse to drown with the rest. POSITIVITY is powerful.

This next part is a series of questions I am asking. I just want you to think about this for a moment. No pressure :)
Have you ever met someone who you are so curious about? Someone who you can't believe exists out there because you have never met someone like this person? Just an ordinary person you might have thought about dismissing at first but once you find out more you are just so intrigued. How about someone who lives so freely? Did you meet a person this year that was honestly caring about others not just themselves? How about someone who was brutually honest but in the most nurturing way? Was this a person who could turn your frown into an amazing smile? Did they make you laugh? Did they make everything seem like it was going to be ok? It could be anyone a friend, a stranger, a person you are married to, or even just starting dating.
I DID, I met someone who I am very intrigued by because they carry all the qualities that most of us human beings do not acquire because we can be selfish. Someone like I have never ever met in my life before. Its a powerful thing. If you have NOT met someone like this I want to challenge you to go out and find this person. The reason I say this is because it will make you a better person and it will be a worth while experience.

So one of my favorite things to do, or maybe even a hobby of mine is meeting strangers. I guess this is how I started to see the qualities people have. Everyone you meet initially is different from the other, they might hold similar characteristics as others. I usually meet a lot, many, tons, (you get the point) of people in the year. especially for my job, but its very few who I stay in touch with. I was privileged to meet a girl this year who was awesome. I mean she is so spontaneous, loves to do these crazy adventures and I even got to challenge myself against her on my trip these past couple months. I see a little bit of me in her. Alright so I have one more challenge which might fall into the last one but basically go talk to strangers. Then decide what you learned from them.

So this year I have enrolled for some science classes, I signed up for the Johnhancock hustle the stair climb in Feburary. I have also been assigned the maid of Honor of my sister's wedding so I have been planning that. I am planning on signing up for the Chicago Marathon but haven't fully commited Ill keep you updated. I haven't planned much for this year except for what I am doing at the momeny.

Alright lastly I want to inform you of this new site I just discovered http://ffffound.com/
its has a lot of neat pictures on there, that are being updated every hour. Check it out if you get a chance some cool stuff.

Happy new year kids, lets start it off right.

The struggle forAmsterdam

2009-03-04T11:04:00.000-06:00

As my plan would have it I have finally arrived in Amsterdam.

I have just left Belgium, I first travelled to Brussels, which was not that great of a city. After a day you are kind of done with the place. I had originally planned to stay there 3 nights. However plans changed and off we went to Bruges, much better. Although Brussels did not dissapoint when it came to food. Everything I tried was amazing. Belgian waffels really are the most amazing I have had.

If you know me you know that I love french fries. Well Belgium is the creator of fries, so I was in fry paradise. For the beer lover there is an outstanding amount of different kinds of beers. Over 500 belgian beers and they even have this place called delirium cafe where there are 2004 different kinds of beers from all over the world. Brussels was def a good experience, its a good place to come for a weekend.

Bruges however was even greater. All of the architecture is still very medival. The structures are so old and beautiful. They call it the venice of the north, very romantic. I went to the chocolate and fries museum. Making fries is an art here and super cheap, chocolate. I am very impressed with their technique and I can never look at fast food fries the same :( ha

Anyhow I really discovered both of these cities in 3 days and all by walking, they are quite small. But I have found myself to actually walk everywhere. Its a better way to check out the city. Anyhow my little adventure to Amsterdam did not turn out the way I expected.

But then again when do things go the way I plan overseas? Rarely. I went to the train station and we were about to get on the train because it was leaving, when there was some sort of an explosion from the train, amanda and I were about 8 feet away from it, we both jumped. I really thought the whole train would explode or something. There was a guy even closer to it, than Amanda and I, after about 15 mins the train conductor said it was a lock problem and we were good to go. I do not know why I really trusted the guy but I didn't want to stay in Belgium. Once we were on our way, the ticket collector came by, and took Amanda's Eurorail ticket. He claimed we both had fake tickets because the paper was different than normal. He put the ticket under a light and then took them saying he had to call about them. I was laughing could not believe that he was accusing us of fake tickets. The thing is you travel with this same pass on every train because we got a global one. This guy talked it over with the other ticket collectors and they kept asking us where we were going. We said Amsterdam! Amanda as getting kind of snappy with the guy and I just did not want to start trouble just yet. So we showed the guy our reciepts but he still did not believe us. He finally said since he could not prove that they were fake he would let us get away with it.

So finally made it to Amsterdam last night. Its really a beautiful city there are so many bicycles here. There are over 600,000 of them. Everywhere you walk or look they are. Everyone is ready to run you over with the bikes as well. Its pretty intense.

We ended up walking some narrow streets to get to our hotel and they have a lot of coffeeshops. But they really do not sell coffee, I am not going to lie but the smell is overwhelming, I want to gag because its everywhere. I am not a fan of the coffeeshops at all. I am glad I am only here for a few days otherwise I would go nuts. I met a guy yesterday as I was having dinner, he said Yalla, to Amanda and I. I turned around and said hey I know what that means. Its a word I learned in Israel, its actually arabic meaning to hurry or quickly. He was an old man, seemed wise. He couldnt believe I knew that he thought I was jewish. He told me he was just kicked out of Israel a few days ago. Apparently he moved there 4 years ago from Amsterdam. He quickly got put into prison once arriving there for a month. I can't remember why he was put in prison. But he was not threatening at all. He taught me a few more words and told me about his time there. He also spoke like 4 other lauguages. Pretty impressive. He invited Amanda and I to go to some Jazz show but we kindly refused we were tired and needed to get our game plan for today.

I went to the Anne Frank and Van gogh museum today. It was really cool. I kept thinking about their lives and the struggles they went through. Obviously Anne just wished she could run outside or ride her bike, something I take for granted at times, as I am sure others do. She was a prisoner at her home. Van Gogh, traveled everywhere but was not happy with his work or life and thought of himself as a failure, and shot himself. If he could only see now the revolution he made in colors.

I thought about how he little things matter. How we sometimes want to conform to society because that is what we are taught. What if we did something different, that society does not look at very fondly? Does that make us less than those with presitgious jobs, people with lots of money, educators? Or does that make us creative? I started thinking about these things today. How the petty things are so ridiculous to get caught up, all the rumors and bad talk. Who cares what matters is what we are actually doing. Secrets can't be kept for too long. We have to be who we are, we have to be honest with ourselves and eachother. As I saw from Van gogh today are harshes critques are ourselves. Its something that I realized today.

So as this is said, I beginning to see more meaning in my travels, from the start to now. I hope to see different views and meet a lot more people. I am so intrigued with everything and just taking it in as it comes.

Age takes over.

2009-01-11T23:37:00.000-06:00

It is funny to think back when we were young and we always wanted to get older. Now that we are older we wish we were younger. I remember being in college and never thought of getting older as the years went by. But I was always the youngest from my friends, my family, and most of the groups I was. Even when I started my first job at Northern Trust as an accountant. I was even a little intimidated being the youngest from my team. When I started my second job, which is where I currently am, I was still the youngest from my team. I never thought about getting older or being older.

However this year there was one younger person on my team, it was strange for me. I was not sure how to feel about it. This past year has made me think a lot of about getting older. About the things I want to accomplish. I am now 24 years old. To be truthfully honest I do not know what I want. I want security but I want freedom. I currently do not believe one can have both. I long for the freedom of no job and to travel the world. However I cringe the thought of not having a job and a stable environment.

I started worrying about getting older. I have had thoughts such as, I should start my career soon. I should be making a lot more money. I should have a steady boyfriend and get ready to marry soon. Really? This is what I was worrying about. Then you watch the movie like Benjamin Button, or P.S. I love you and it makes you think. The truth is were always getting older, perhaps even wiser. I like getting that warm feeling inside telling me is going to be alright.

I have learned so much from this job and previous encounters. I have had real life situations. I have been under a lot of pressure. I have made many mistakes over and over this past year. I regret it sometimes but than again I do not because I learned from them, and hope not to make them again. I miss having someone so close to me. The truth is, sometimes some things are not meant to be.

One thing I have learned is to work very very hard in whatever it is I do. My parents told me this since I was very young. To prove yourself so no one can doubt what you are capable of. Being a leader is something your born with, at least that is what I believe. I always look for new challenges. My current job is no longer challenging me. Part of me is very bitter. I feel as though I have worked so hard for this company. Sometimes I believe that they do not care about anything but results. I have done everything I could. I have trained my co-workers well. In fact we have done more than the rest of the teams. I am bitter that now that I want to move up, do something different there is no guarantee for me. However I knew this all along, its corporate America. It is a brutal reality. I know it is not ok to feel this way, and everyday it gets easier. I let go a little, I sometimes regret working so hard, or just feel like I do not care. But the matter of the fact I do care and I do not regret it, because in the long run I proved to be the best that I can. I hope that they realize this and I know that one day I will get to where I want to be.

So as of now since I cannot take my long 4-5 month trip around the world, I am going to travel Europe for 5 weeks. I also started playing with the idea of working in exchange for a place to sleep and eat. I found some websites that allow people to do this in other countries. I have longed to stay in Israel for an extended amount of time, however things are not that great right now, so plans have changed again. I have decided to work in southern France or Greece either on a farm or somewhere in the country. I just want to learn a different language. I do not want to worry about things, just live life at this moment. Most of the places I looked are on 7 acres of land, with the mountains as the view or something so peaceful and full of nature, I cannot wait. I believe I can do this after my European backpacking. Just stay in one place for a while. I can't wait to meet new people, to have a place to call home without moving so much. To wake up to the mountains and something so green, that I would have a huge smile on my face every morning.

All I can say is I am sick of planning and being so organized. Being so uptight and having control of things. Sometimes things do not go the way we plan and that is completely alright. Things change and that is where I need to be.

The beginning.

2008-12-30T23:17:00.000-06:00

I have been traveling around the US and other countries for the past two years. I have traveled mostly for work, but some has been for my own satisfaction. I have mostly written mass e-mails. I have noticed that this is a good way to inform my friends and family of my whereabouts. However I formed this blog to make it easier for those who I do not have email communication with.

As I am about to embark my 5 month trip about the world I would like to keep a documentation of my findings. I cannot wait for this adventure and the lessons to be learned on this trip.

I will be traveling with a friend/ co-worker Amanda. I plan on starting my trip in Iceland. From there I head to Belgium, England, Germany, Switzerland, Egypt, Israel, Jordan, India, Thailand, Bali, and perhaps other countries. My initials plans were to move to Israel for 6 months to a year after I finished my tour/ work in the states.

To be honest I never really thought this day would come. I traveled to Chile last winter and I went by myself for the first week. This was my real first exposure to so many people traveling by themselves. But also how many people just backpack around for fun. Many were my age. Some had quit their jobs and decided to travel. Others were studying aboard and the other had just left to come work in these countries. The idea of traveling for a long period of time became more of a reality. I thought if they can just get up and go, why can't I. Besides I have always wanted to see the world, this is the perfect time. I am still young, not married, no kids, and willing to leave now.

I am not really nervous instead more anxious to leave and start this chapter in my life. I have met so many incredible people in my previous travels, I cannot image it begin any less than that now. My journey begins March 2nd.